Wet Gullet Membership Program

Imagine this. . .

You hear the swampy echo of gullet drippings hitting your lap and plate. You’re waiting for your food here at Crazy Dirk’s Turkey Lounge, and that gullet is just as wet as can be. 

You’re sipping on your Sultry Turkey cocktail and can feel the gravy starting to radiate from your pores. It’s so hot in here. Why is it so hot in here? Has it gotten warmer since you walked in, or is the gravy hitting harder than usual?

Hastily, Crazy Dirk emerges from the kitchen with a plate of turkey nuggets and deviled turkey eggs. A stomach rumbling sourness washes over you as he walks past you to deliver them to another table, petting the turkeys with a free hand as he passes. 

As he ambles back to the kitchen and passes your table, he pats you on the back and assures you that the food will be right out. He wiped a bit of turkey grease on your back, and for a second you wonder if it was intentional.

Before you can decide, he reappears with your platters. Your greased gullet can now be stuffed. 

You finish up your dinner and slump back in your chair, letting out a chunky squelch of a burp. A few of the turkeys glance at you jealously. You think about how fortunate you were to get a Wet Gullet Membership. 

Crazy Dirk comes over with a complementary bottle of his famous “Dirk Sauce” and thanks you for our patronage. He pulls a baby chick from his pocket and tells us he just hatched last week.
  

“He’s yours now!” Dirk says as he hands you the turkey chick. You take the chick and look lovingly into his eyes. Is this what the joy of motherhood feels like?

That Wet Gullet Membership sure was worth it!